Expect When Going Through a Divorce in Tennessee
In short, the answer is Hell. You should be prepared to be the victim. The victim of your wife's greed, vengance, and laziness, a victim of her lawyer's greed, a victim of the courts lust for power, and a victim of the Tennessee legislatures susceptability to the Tenneessee Bar Associations influence on the legislature. You will be a pawn in the Tennessee divorce industry, your wife will only be a bishop, the lawyers and judges are the kings and queens. Prepare to be systematically raped.
To begin with,
you are at a big disadvantage if she is not working. You will have to
support her while the process, which may take years, proceeds. The judge
will likely order you to support her with monthly payments, provide her health insurance,
and pay for her lawyer. She and her lawyer are in the drivers seat and
they will know it. They will know you have to take time from work, all
done with the blessing of the court. An excellent example is a marriage
that lasted less than five months but litigation carried on for six years.
legislature has seen fit to make mediation a mandatory part of divorce. Don't
believe mediation will help your cause. In essence, it is no more that
a lawyer subsidy device The couple's two lawyers and the mediator (usually
another lawyer) will all profit at your expense. You will pay $500 to
$1,000 for the experience, lose a day's worth of work, and of course, pay for
her part of the mediation.
You will be kept guessing about when your case will finally get to court. The lawyers will make you feel like the prisoner who waits to see when the inquisitioner will come to torture him next, and what form that torture will take.
They will drag you into various hearings concernning how much pendente lite (temporary) alimony you will be required while the system screws you. Her lawyer will paint her as a helpless damsel in distress who just is totally dependent on you supporting her in order that she be able to continue her lifestyle of leisure. Forcing her to actually get a job and support herself is not an option the judge will agree to. After all, if she were self-supporting it would bring down the system's entire scheme of permanent, lifetime alimony.
If you should be so bold as to believe you should stay in the home (for which you probably paid more towards than she), you will attend a hearing to determine who must leave the house. It will be initiated by her because her lawyer knows you will be forced out, resulting in you incurring the additional expense of renting another place to live, additional utilitiy bills, the purchasing of furniture, etc.. It's just one more inconvenience for you, she gets no inconvenience. In fact, her boyfriend can now come over without being caught by you.
Speaking of friends, there is another reason she will drag the process out for what seems like an eternity. She will watch what you do during the great stall. Be careful not to help or communicate in any way with a female friend or business associate during this time. Any communication or connection you have during this time with a female can and will be used against you and will gleefully be used by a judge as an excuse to justify lifetime alimony for her, regardless of what treachery she might have committed.
You may quite possibly even have the insult of a hearing for the sole purpose of paying her attorney fees up to that point in time. Yes, that is correct, her attorney stalls, drags things out for months or even years, all the time knowing he can tap your bank account before the judge has even heard the case. An example of how the system is built for lawyers is evidenced by attorney fees of $50,000.
In conclusion, you will be a pawn, jerked from hearing to hearing, dragging you down while enriching her laywer, enpowering a judge, and setting her up for legalized theft which could last or the rest of your life.